Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

Hey There!

You may have heard the saying “Absence makes the heart grow fonder,” which means that time away from someone or something makes you miss its presence. In the midst of these hard times with COVID-19 and shutdowns across the world, I want to encourage you to focus on the good things before quarantine. Think of all the fun activities, time with friends and family, and other enjoyments that make you happy. I don’t mean to make you dwell on them and discourage you, but to show you all the benefits and importance of them. 

In this unexpected and uncharted season of life, I’ve had a lot of time to do some thinking. Reflecting on the past, on my relationships and friendships, on my inward self, and most importantly God’s promises. Through all this thinking, there have been times of sadness and missing what was before the shutdowns – but there have also been times of peace and relaxation due to not going anywhere, which surprised me. I guess what I’m trying to say is: quarantine doesn’t have to be bad if you don’t make it. Focusing on creative ways to stay busy has led me to try some hobbies that I haven’t touched in a while, and to test some new things. I’ve learned the importance of resting when I feel my body needs it, and the importance of staying active and being physical. 

Through these times I have come to understand and root myself in God’s truths, and I am constantly being reminded of Romans 8:28:

“And we know that all things work together for good, to those that love God.”

I know that this quarantine happened for a reason. We can’t appreciate what we don’t have, but we can learn to appreciate what we do have. I think this tough situation is a blessing in disguise: time away from our family, friends, and activities can teach us the importance of them. It can also teach us the importance of friendships, and show us how strong our relationships are. Looking back on all the things that are cancelled can be disappointing, but when the world is reset back to normal, we are all going to appreciate what we have a whole lot more. After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder. ❤

 

Chick & Co.

Living the Sweet Life

True Friends

Hey There!

Have you ever felt drained after talking to one of your friends? Does it feel like all the conversations are about is them? I’ve felt that way, too. Sometimes, friends can get a little too comfortable (us included), that they don’t realize if their conversations only point towards them and what they’re up to. It can be exhausting to be the ear for others to talk into about whatever is going on in their life, especially if they don’t do the same for you. It’s easy to just paste on a smile and nod your head occasionally when these things happen, but sometimes it’s better to pull back a bit and let them do some of the work, too. My sister is constantly reminding me that 

Friendships are a two way road. It takes two people to do the work, not just you.

When situations like these come up, it’s ok to reply to what the other person is talking about, and state an experience you’ve gone through or something you’ve done that is relatable to the conversation. It can remind them that you would like to share your life with them, too. If they ignore what you said, try again – everyone deserves a second chance. If they still don’t pay attention, then pull back a bit. Maybe don’t comment as much, or (depending on the circumstances) politely leave the conversation all together. If you’re in a group of people, let them finish what they’re saying, comment, then politely tell them there are a few other people you would like to touch base with. If you are chatting online or texting, tell them you have things that need to be done. It’s important to take care of yourself, and taking a step back to clear your head can do wonders. Friends are supposed to listen to one another and have each other’s backs. 

It can be hurtful when friends don’t seem interested in what you are talking about, but sometimes that is a sign that God is telling you to move on. It can be painful, especially if they are a close friend, but which is more important (and healthy) to you: maintaining a friendship that you’re not getting what you want out of it, or finding a new friend who is great at talking AND listening? True friends will care about what you say, and want to hear you say it. 

Also, don’t cut off the friendship too soon. It’s important to remember that everyone makes mistakes, and not to be too harsh on someone, because everyone appreciates receiving grace – even if they don’t realize their mistake yet. I think that is one of the bravest and kindest things we can do: extending grace when the other person didn’t realize they needed it. After all, we most likely don’t know everything that is going on in their life. They could be struggling with something under the surface and need some support, or maybe they just had a bad day! 

I hope this helps inspire you to evaluate your friendships and make healthy decisions. 🙂 

“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” Matthew 18:15-17

 

Chick & Co.

Living the Sweet Life

The Opinions Of Others

Opinion [uh-pin-yuhn] noun

A personal view, attitude, or appraisal. 

When I think of the word “opinion,” I don’t take it very seriously. All that it means is a personal thought or view. So why should we seek others’ opinions of us?

We as humans tend to get caught up in what other people think of us – buy why? It seems an easy thing to keep in check, yet sometimes – especially when we don’t know the people around us – we will look to others for our value. “Oh no, that person didn’t smile at me when I smiled at them: I must be doing something wrong!” Nothing is wrong with you. Everyone is different. Everyone is unique.

If everyone were the same, it would be a boring earth we live on. There would be no contrast like that seen in books: When two characters fall in love because they are so different; or when an enemy realizes his opponent is quite similar to himself. It would be a very grey world instead of one bursting with the colors of uniqueness! 

When I think of value, a certain quote from the Marvel character Peggy Carter pops into my mind:

“I know my value. Everyone else’s opinion doesn’t matter.”

Never be afraid of who you are. Picture yourself in a store. There are two mugs next to each other on a shelf. You look at the tags. One is cheaper, and less sturdy, while the other one costs more money but is hand-crafted. Sometimes the cost of the mug will make you walk away, not wanting to purchase it – but if you picture a human, the same as you, carefully taking a long time to create a unique work of art, that image makes you think twice. Yes, there are imperfections, but those same imperfections are what makes it beautiful! 

We are like that example. God has carefully hand-crafted each and every one of us in His image – why go and be a factory version that looks identical to all the ones around it? If you copy the trends and opinions of others, you will not be who you were meant to be. Yes, God is changing us. But He is making us better than we could of imagined! Who cares what other people think of you? True friends see who you really are and love you for it – and you will find that those genuine friends will stick with you through the hard times along with the good times. 

My prayer for you is that you will recognize who you are in Christ and be glad to show your true colors. 🙂

 

© Chick & Co.

Chick & Co.

Living the Sweet Life

Say What You Think

I’m sure you’ve heard the saying “Say what you think,” or “Speak your mind.” 

I personally find that very difficult. Sometimes I will agree with others simply because I don’t want to make them mad or upset — sometimes I actually do agree, but not always.

I have found that 

If you don’t stand up for your opinion, nobody will know you have one.

Everyone’s opinion matters, and I hate to think that maybe someone doesn’t feel important because they get ignored. Please, make sure you listen and respect other people’s opinions, because an opinion is not something that can be right or wrong.

Take the time to listen to someone when they talk to you. Even if you don’t like the person very much, take a moment to listen. And I mean really listen, not just hear. 

Hearing and listening are two different things. Hearing is being able to physically identify the sounds around you; listening is absorbing and understanding them.

Stand up for your opinion! I realize it takes courage to speak your mind, but it will be worth it. Don’t go with the flow. Don’t copy everyone else, or you won’t be who you truly are — because each person was made differently, and you can never copy someone exactly. Be yourself. After all, there’s nothing to be ashamed of. 

You are beautiful!

© Chick & Co.

Chick & Co.

Living the Sweet Life